Conventional wisdom holds that change takes time. After all, many people spend years in therapy, developing insight and working through their issues, and often continue to struggle with the same problems. I’ve certainly been there!
But we all know people who have changed overnight: the chronically overweight person who suddenly becomes an ultramarathoner, the alcoholic who quits cold turkey, the atheist who attends one church service and finds God.
We’ve been told that behavior change is hard, and in most cases, it is. We need more research to understand the exceptions. But in my practice, I’ve found one factor that seems to help people experience real change, often within the course of a single session.
That factor is memory reconsolidation.
Memory reconsolidation is when old memory traces in the brain are reactivated and thus become malleable. Normally, we think of long-term memories as relatively stable. But when those memories are actively recalled, they can be modified.
You can think of it like taking an old Lego set out of storage and putting it back together in a new configuration.
Imagine someone who’s been through a bad car accident. Since the accident, they’ve developed a fear of driving. As soon as they get in the driver’s seat, their heart rate goes up and their hands start sweating.
That’s because the memory of the accident has created a conditioned fear response.
In order to help this person, we need to reactivate the memory of the car accident. In therapy, that means remembering the incident in as much detail as possible, so the client actually feels at least a bit of the fear response. Then, we need to turn off the fear response in order to change the way the memory is stored.
In some laboratory studies, they’ve accomplished this by injecting patients with propranolol, a drug that blocks stress hormone receptors in the amygdala.
But in therapy, we can accomplish the same thing using the eye movements of EMDR, the acupoint tapping of EFT, or even hypnosis. Other forms of therapy may work in a similar way. Bruce Ecker and colleagues discussed this process in detail in their seminal book Unlocking the Emotional Brain, which I was fortunate to read early in my therapy career.
Interestingly, there is a parallel to this process in Indian philosophy.
According to classical texts, our experiences in life leave psychological impressions on our mind. These impressions are called samskaras. Our samskaras, in turn, affect our future behavior and experiences.
“Purifying” our samskaras is part of the process of both Hindu and Buddhist yoga.
I believe that real personal transformation often comes as a result of changing the way memories are stored in our brains and nervous systems. Like the process of purifying samskaras in classical yoga, modern forms of therapy and coaching can help us change not only our conscious thoughts, but how we are unconsciously wired at a neurological level.
This is how real transformation happens, and as I’ve seen many times in therapy, it can happen in an instant.
Do you know someone who’s made major changes, seemingly overnight? Have you experienced this kind of transformation yourself? Let me know your thoughts and experiences in the comments.
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as is her norm around noon on most Monday mornings, Jeannette is preparing to sit down and closely review your weekly infusion of wisdom. As her partner this era, I want to confirm the positive effect it seems to have on her attitude and mood each time she digests your comments.
This edition really resonated, Chris. I think I discovered the same result when I was introduced to scenario planning. It was the ability to rewrite stories, including my own, that filled me.with possibility. And therefore agency and hope.